Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Randomize
