I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Randomize
