My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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