Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
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