So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize