my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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