I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Randomize