please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
