The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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