Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
We smell like vodka and hangover
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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