Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
