You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
She's the barista slut.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Randomize
