I want to stick my p in your. b.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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