and you said cock pushups were impossible
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize
