you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Randomize
