I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
