and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Randomize
