my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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