One girl and one boy is just not enough.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
