I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
