do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
It's shark week go big or go home
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
