Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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