come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
