I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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