What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
