Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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