I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
