Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize