love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize