Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Randomize
