glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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