I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
