he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize