do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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