she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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