I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
