According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
