where am i from again
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize