come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Randomize