she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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