Me. At least after what I've been through.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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