i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
this just has baby written all over it
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
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