So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Randomize
