the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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