Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
this beer tastes like vomit already
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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