I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
