I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
