would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
