SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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