Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
