Sponge bath it is.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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